Shiver
by ViciousPixie
Summary: Yay! its finally done! Please read, fanfic/songfic. please R/R, i enjoy flames too! *smiles* thanks!
1. Part One

Hello, I am new to this whole thing here.so yeah, I am guessing that my story isn't that great, but oh well. Its something I just decided to write, and it's a very long songfic/fanfiction, so this may end up in 3 or more chapters. Um.yeah, so I guess this is where I say "these are not my characters, they belong to Square. Altho I wish I owned them, yada yada. Also, the song "shiver" (the lyrics included in this story) also do not belong to me, they are Coldplay's." ok, now that that's all over with, hopefully I wont get in any trouble! So yeah, enjoy the story and reply to it so I know how much it sucks and all. Thanks! ~ViciousPixie~  
  
  
  
A glittering tear drops down fair skin; the sun gleaming on it to light up the crystal shape. The figure watched from its shadow engulfed spot next to a wall. Other people, familiar faces to her, talk and have fun, without her. Two people especially seem an interest to her and the cause of her sorrow. The blue fabric of a duster type jacket swayed back and forth hypnotically as the woman wearing it and the man she was draped on slowly danced to the temporary music being played by a young aspiring guitarist. As the tear traveled down her cheek and dripped off her chin, she left with a twirl of light blonde hair and the flutter of red fabric.  
  
So I look in you direction  
  
But you pay me no attention, do you?   
  
The movement caught the eye of the young guitarist, who stopped the tune with a cocked head, flipped-up hair brushing against her shoulder.  
  
"Was that Quistis?" She asked herself, unaware that the others had now become aware of her gaze. A gloved hand was placed on her shoulder and she looked up at the owner. His brown hair loosened from its once usual ponytail, Irvine smiled at her worryingly.  
  
"I think you need to get some sleep, Selph. You're starting to not only get bossier, but see mirages now too!" He laughed as she smacked his shoulder playfully. Grabbing at the "wound", he yelped out and twisted his face in agony, but then smirked at her flirtatiously. She pulled him closer and wrapped herself in his large tan trench coat, yawning and burrowing her face into his muscular chest.  
  
"Maybe," another yawn, "I should just sleep right here?" She continued to wiggle into a comfortable position in his arms until she found it.  
  
"Sure, as long as you get some sleep, Selph-IEEE!" He said just as she bit his chest. He pushed her away as she smiled back. "WHAT was that about?"  
  
"There's too much work to be done to sleep. Get back to work!" The other by-standers laughed, but quickly went back to work when Selphie glared at them. She smirked as she admired the work that was being done for it was almost finished.  
  
I know you don't listen to me  
  
'Cause you say you see straight through me, don't you?   
  
Quistis ran to the only place that was safe from people's remarks and questions, but also a place of torture-Squall's old room, which became hers for the time being. She had given up her room to the brunette of her nightmares, to the one she most despised, because she's not a bad person. She knew Rinoa wanted to be closer to the elevator, which would be closer to the headmaster's room, and Squall of course. She scowled and threw herself onto her bed, his bed, and began to think of all the stupid foolish things she has done, again. She wished she had done things differently, said things that she should have said but never did, but now it didn't matter. The man of her dreams was marrying the brunette.  
  
"Its only natural," she thought aloud, "for a prince to marry a princess; two picture perfect people to have a picture perfect wedding, and then a perfect life there after." she cried to herself, body crumpled into a ball in her sheets, trying to get warm, but could never seem to. Eventually, she fell asleep, shivering.  
  
And on and on, from the moment I wake  
  
To the moment I sleep  
  
I'll be there by your side  
  
Just you try and stop me  
  
The group was still in the Quad, preparing and decorating it for the event, which takes place in two days. Selphie excitedly instructed Irvine, Zell, and other SeeD students on where to set up chairs, tables, and the large stage for the long list of people planning to come. Rinoa helped Selphie make the coordinating plans with the food, drinks, entertainment, etc. Everyone was cooperative and worked hard, except for a lone figure who had wondered away to sit upon a bench in a corner. Grey eyes, glazed over with a dullness from the utter shock of it all, the dark circles under the blank eyes expressed sleeplessness, stared annoyingly expressionless at the distant people putting together his future.  
  
Rinoa glanced around to find Squall, to ask him what color the table cloths should be, and eventually found him, head in hands, hair covering his eyes, and basically in his usual off-standish behavior from before, the attitude she most hated and tried to wean him off of. She smiled at him as he looked up at her. She put a hand on her waist and shook her head sadly before walking over to him.  
  
"C'mon Squally," She said in her trying-to-be-cute voice, "Stop looking so sheepish! You know I hate that!" Squall winced at the sound of his nickname. She reached her hand out to him, a beam of light gleaming off the month-old diamond ring. Squall faked a smile and placed his hand into hers, as she pulled him up and tugged him towards Selphie. "You can come help me!" She said with a smirk.  
  
"Oh, great." He tried to hide the utter fear in his voice, but it still quavered with uncertainty. He looked around at all the people helping and realized someone was missing, "Where's Quistis?"  
  
I'll be waiting in line  
  
Just to see if you care  
  
Quistis dreamt of her prince, the one she wished would be her night, not Rinoa's. She reminisced of the day she made the worst mistake of her life; the day she told Zell about how she felt retaining to her and Squall's relationship.  
  
'Do you like Squall, Quistis?' he had asked her. She froze, unsure of what to do or say in response; she knew Zell was Squall's best friend, what if he told Squall?  
  
'NO! Of course not! He's like a brother to me.'  
  
'So what would you do if he actually liked you?' He had asked, not really believing her.  
  
'What do you mean?' She was anxiously nervous and wondered if there was anything else behind his reason for asking such questions, like if Squall actually did like her.  
  
'Nothing, I'm just curious, that's all.'  
  
'Oh.' She said with a sigh of disappointment, 'I would probably turn him down then.' She lied to Zell, straight through her teeth. Should Squall have told her he liked her, she would more then likely had jumped him, gleefully thankful to the gods.  
  
Oh, did you want me to change?  
  
Well I'll change for good  
  
She shifted under her sheets as the dream took her a little farther into the future from the last one. Squall stood in front of her, with the dark haired beauty next to him. He had just introduced her for the first time; her sweet smile gleamed with the vanilla chap stick she wore. Her hair glistened with perfection and sleekness. Quistis hated her just by seeing them together, but as she got to know Rinoa, she realized just how irritatingly perfect she was, which only angered Quistis more. She had everything Squall could possibly want, obviously if he was with her. Quistis wished she could know exactly what it was about Rinoa that made him lover her so much, as so she could try to become whatever that was. Too bad Rinoa was with Squall; Quistis actually liked her as a person and would gladly befriend her, if she weren't with him that is.  
  
Ever since Squall was taken, Quistis became bitter towards him, as if it was his entire fault she was miserably alone without him. She found many pointless reasons to get mad at him. She would yell and argue with him for no real reason and he would just sit back and allow it to happen, knowing she would eventually give into his next smile directed towards her. He would allow the abuse, take the horribly mean things she would say to him, and allow them to roll off his back. That only made her love him more.  
  
She would be able to forget about him and move on if she didn't see him everyday. Damn her for becoming so close to him as a friend. She loved him too much to just stop talking to him, to just give up on any chance at all. Besides, after all her attempts to drive him away from her with the arguments and such, he never let her go away. He always accepted and forgave her for everything she had done.  
  
And I want you to know  
  
That you'll always get your way  
  
Squall helplessly stood on a platform, where he had been posed for the last hour, while he was fitted for a tuxedo. The tailor was getting anxious and tired of Squall's picky attitude and threatened to quit many times to Rinoa.  
  
"Ok," the tailor said with an angry expression on his moustached face, "This is the last of my fabric. I have no other colors, no other textures, nothing!" He presented Prussian blue velvet material to Squall with a hopeful face. Squall took one look and turned his nose up at it.  
  
"Rinoa," he said turning to her, "Where did you find this guy?" The tailor threw the last of his fabric into his bag and packed the rest of his materials.  
  
"Rinoa, I'm sorry, but I can't deal with this 'man'. I hope you can when you're married to him!" With that, the tailor stormed out, nearly hitting Zell with the large door.  
  
"What's that all about?" Zell asked, rubbing the back of his neck. He paused as he saw the room was so full with tension it could be cut with a knife. Rinoa stared angrily at Squall, who was stepping off the pedestal happily.  
  
"You know he's been my family tailor for years! How can you be so disrespectful, Squall?" Blinking "innocently", squall only looked at her as if she had gone insane. Then, simply, her replied calmly, but with a slight sarcastic tone.  
  
"I'm only picky because I want this to be perfect. I only want it to be perfect for you." Then he blinked a few more times. Rinoa wasn't sure if he was mocking her or sincere, but she threw her hands in the air and left the room, slamming the door behind her. A small devious smile spread upon Squall's lips as he took a seat on his bed. Zell, puzzled, looked at his friend with a weird expression on his face, one that said 'what the hell happened?'. "Hey Zell! Whatcha need?" Squall inquired as he sprawled out on the bed.  
  
"Well, I was coming to see how your tux was lookin'," he said as he scratched his head and looked around the empty, suit-less room, "but I guess that's not happenin'." He smiled questionably at his comrade and asked with a tone of worry, "Squall, what's up with you?"  
  
Squall, still lying on his bed, dully replied, "Nothing." Zell knew better then that. He walked over, took a seat on the bed, and stared Squall in the eyes.  
  
"You're not having second thoughts, are you?" Squall looked away to stare at the wall instead of the baby blues of his friend.  
  
"Second thoughts? When did I ever get the first one?" He said, almost inaudibly. Zell furrowed his brow.  
  
"What d'ya mean by that?" Squall rolled over and sighed, hoping Zell would give up.  
  
"Nothing, never mind." Zell punched him in the back hard enough to make Squall sit up with a yelp.  
  
"Don't fucking lie to me! What d'ya mean by that?"  
  
"What I mean is she has controlled my every muscle ever since we got back from the whole Ultimecia thing. She holds the whole 'knight' thing over my head; she's the one who told me to ask her to wed! She's the one who chose the ring, the date, the guest list.she even chose who the fucking best man was going to be!" Zell looked at him in surprise. Not only to hear Squall say so much at one time, but to yell it; this was serious. After a moment of silence, Zell had to lighten up the mood.  
  
"Ya mean you wouldn't 'ove chosen me for your best man on your own? That hurts Squall, really, it does." He made a sad puppy face and fluttered his eyelashes at Squall. "You'd rather have Irvine up there with ya, flirting with all the bridesmaids?" They both chuckled at the thought, knowing it was true.  
  
"Yeah, and Selphie getting all upset about it, she'd probably throw something at him!" Zell stood and put a hand on his hip, doing his best Selphie stance that he could.  
  
"Irvine! How could you? Aren't I prettier then them?" Zell imitated her voice scarily well; even the pitch was high enough. Squall also got into the act and bowed his head into submission, putting his pillow on his head, over his eyes much like Irvine does with his hat.  
  
"No Ma'am, you're much prettier then any of them Selph, really." Then Zell threw a pillow at him and ran away "crying". Squall laughed at their silliness and sat back down upon the bed, where Zell soon joined. "Thanks Zell, you always know how to cheer me up." Zell smiled at him pleasingly, but then it quickly faded back into a serious look, well, as serious as it gets with Zell.  
  
"No prob. But, what's really going on in that mind of yours Squall? Its not good for you to be forced into this if you don't want to." Zell searched Squall's face for a sign of explanation, like maybe it was only jitters. Squall looked away, as if ashamed for his thoughts. "Is it Quistis?" Squall turned sharply to look at Zell, surprised. 


	2. Part Two

And I wanted to say,  
  
Don't you shiver? Shiver shiver  
  
Quistis woke to find herself bathed in light from the nearby window. She rubbed her eyes open to look outside, seeing two birds perched on the balcony's ledge and a bright blue sky beyond them. 'I don't remember that being open before I napped.' She thought. She closed her eyes before they watered from the brightness of the light. Through her eyelids, she noticed a shadow creep over her, the warmth from the sun being replaced with a cold darkness. She opened her eyes, expecting to see an incoming storm, which was previously predicted, but instead found a figure hovering over her.  
  
"Hey Quistis, babe." The tall blonde said lovingly.  
  
"S-Seifer?" She uttered in disbelief. He shrugged with a smile and sat on the bed, next to her. Quistis flung herself into his arms, hugging him as hard as she could. He welcomed this affection and wrapped his arms around her. She stayed in his arms for a surprisingly long time until she realized it wasn't a dream. Sitting up, she punched him hard in the chest, making him grunt from the impact. "Where have you been? You just up and left after." She paused and looked down at her sheets sadly.  
  
"After you left me for the over-achiever?" She nodded, still avoiding his gazing eyes. "I never did understand why you did that, and I didn't forgive you until." He paused, searching for his feelings for if he wanted to go through with telling her what was next. He lifted her chin, forcing her to meet with his eyes. "Until I realized something. Everything I did after that I did for you." Quistis looked at him, confused, and pulled away. "I did and still love you Quisty." He looked away for the first time that day, as not to be hurt by her expression. She sat, stunned by this confession, and had no idea what else to say. He broke the silence for her by standing up with a rustle of heavy fabric.  
  
"Where are you going?" She asked in vain, only to receive a shrug. "Please, don't leave again!" He turned to her, a tear beginning to fall.  
  
"It was a mistake for me to come back. I-I just missed your beautiful face." He went towards the door but Quistis jumped up and grabbed his arm.  
  
"Please, don't go.I need you." Seifer looked at her with hopeful eyes, confused by this pledge. Her eyes were also teary and he noticed how dark the rings were under her sorrow-filled eyes. His grasp on the door loosened and she smiled faintly, collapsing into his warm embrace knowing he would hold her for an eternity.  
  
Sing it loud and clear  
  
I'll always be waiting for you  
  
After a while of silence between the two, Quistis broke the embrace and walked over to take a seat upon the bed, patting the spot next to her, inviting Seifer to join. He took off his massive coat, threw it on the end of the bed, and took the offer.  
  
"I still can't believe you actually went and fought with Squall after I left you. That angered me to think you had to be so immature!" Seifer looked down as if he was a little child being scolded.  
  
"I know, I did a lot of foolish things.but they were all in attempts to get you back." Quistis glared at him in disbelief.  
  
"So you scarred Squall for me? You almost killed him, yourself and later endangered many lives just for me? You created mass destruction and ruined lives for me? You even put my own life in danger, all for me you say. Seifer Almasy, that makes no sense!"  
  
"I know it seems stupid, but all true.I thought if I could show you I was more powerful, more important, more in love.that you would see in me whatever you see in the pussy.I mean Squall." He sighed loudly in despair from his mistakes. "I was really immature about it. Its just that I had never loved someone the way I love you, Quisty, and when you left me for him, the one I already despised for being perfect, something snapped. I'm sorry, so sorry." He put his head in his hands and shook it sadly, then he looked back up to her, "That's the main reason why I came back, to get your forgiveness." Tears formed in her eyes as she heard him speak.  
  
"Seifer.I have never had anyone care for me so much like you have. What you just told me is the best thing anyone has ever done in an attempt to only get my approval. For all I did to you, for all that time while I ignored you, refused to see your pledge of love.I feel so ignorant. I am so sorry I broke your heart."  
  
"Shh.it's alright, you don't have to apologize to me for something you couldn't help." He said, while wiping a tear away from the tip if her nose. "You know, you're even beautiful when crying."  
  
So, you know how much I need ya  
  
But you never even see me, do you?  
  
And is this my final chance of getting you?   
  
"What do you mean by that, Zell?" Squall asked, as if he was just accused of treason.  
  
"Oh, I don't know, I was just thinking that maybe you still had feelings for her, and that's why you've been weird-thinking about your other options." He said, with a wink and playful shove with his shoulder. Squall only glared at him.  
  
"I'm not a cheater, Zell."  
  
"I never said you were."  
  
"Then just what were you saying? That I want to leave Rinoa for Quistis?" Zell shrugged. "Well, I'm not a cheater." Zell nodded. "I do have feelings for Quistis and I am going to marry her!" He realized what he said and bit his lip, ashamed. The blonde nudged him and gave a reassuring look to let him know it was okay. "Quistis." Squall laid back down on the bed, looking at the ceiling for concentration. Zell lay with his head next to Squall's and stared up as well.  
  
"Whatcha lookin' at?" He turned to look at the troubled brunette who also turned to return the stare, before getting up off the bed and putting on his leather coat. "Where ya going now?" Squall opened the door and stepped out.  
  
"To talk to Rinoa." The door shut and Zell quickly got up and hurried to the door.  
  
And on and on, from the moment I wake  
  
'Til the moment I sleep  
  
I'll be there by your side  
  
Just you try and stop me   
  
"What are you saying? Our wedding is in two days from now!" Rinoa Growled.  
  
"I've realized I never wanted this to begin with, you're just not the one for me." Rinoa was looking him up and down in disbelief.  
  
"And just who is?" She said, placing a hand on her hip and tapping her foot irritably.  
  
"I don't know for sure yet, but I know I need to look around more before jumping into a relationship like we have." Rinoa's sorceress eyes burned with fury. "So, this is the end. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize you're not for me." With that, he turned for the door.  
  
"You can't leave me! You're my knight!" She said, grabbing the back of his jacket.  
  
"This isn't some fantasy, Rinoa, this is real life." He opened the door and two bodies fell into a scrambling heap on the floor. They looked up and smiled.  
  
"Heh, sorry man.couldn't help it." Zell said as Selphie climbed off him.  
  
"You two try to calm her down, I've got someone to see." Rinoa turned away as Squall left her alone with the two friends. A large tear rolled down her face and fell upon her pale hand, which was gripping Squall's ring on her necklace tightly. Her eyes turned from red burning flames of hatred into cool pools of water.  
  
I'll be waiting in line  
  
Just to see if you care (if you care)   
  
Seiffer put his hand on Quistis's face, stroking her soft cheek with his thumb. She smiled at him with her tear-streaked face and red nose. He had to laugh a little to himself; she was even desirable to him looking in the state she was. He brushed away a loose strand of hair and wiped off a lingering tear.  
  
"Seifer."  
  
"Quistis?"  
  
"Seifer, I missed you." She said with a smile.  
  
"As did I you." He was what she needed to keep her mind off Squall. She had forgotten how sweet he was, how much he actually cared for her. She never forgot how handsome he was, however, but she didn't quite remember just how brightly his eyes sparkled with love for her. She snuggled closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder, receiving the sweet Seifer smell of sweat and musk. He took a deep breath of her, smelling the jasmine in her hair. How he had longed and dreamed of that smell. That smell could never be matched by anything or anyone. He lifted her head up to gaze into her eyes again. "Quisty, I've got to kiss you."  
  
He bent down to press his lips against her flesh and to his pleasure, she allowed him to and even returned the tender caress. He embraced her, pulling her closer to him. His tongue traced her bottom lip in hopes it would gain entrance, and his wish was granted. She parted her lips allowing the familiar taste to enter, memories of the past came to them both, remembering how it was and it seemed as though nothing had changed.  
  
A moment later, Seifer puled away, still holding Quistis's ivory face. "God how I missed those lips." He said with a loving smile. A tear of happiness flowed down her face. "Don't cry anymore babe. I'm here forever." He kissed the tear away from her face. "See, that's how we fix those problems from now on, okay?" She nodded before hugging him again and nuzzling into his neck. "I love you babe." He whispered into her ear.  
  
Did you want me to change?  
  
Well I'll change for good   
  
Squall quickly walked through the hallways with an overwhelming feel of freedom. It took Zell asking him about Quistis to finally realize he had feelings for her. He thought he might love her, actually, and felt stupid for not realizing it sooner. Turning around a hall corner, he saw his old room door at the end; Quistis's room now. 'She'll be happy to get her old room back at least.' He thought.  
  
Before entering, he ran ideas on what to say to her through her mind, but couldn't seem to get it right. 'Hey Quisty. How have you been?' He thought while pacing back and forth outside the door. 'I just broke off the wedding, wasn't what I wanted.I realize I only want you.'  
  
"Fuck this!" He said as he grabbed the doorknob. The door opened slowly, just in case she was asleep; it was about 10 p.m., time for the garden curfew to kick in. He opened it slightly and heard her speak, talking to someone, evidentially. He wanted to get a clue on who was in her room at this hour before he entered, in case it was something not to be disturbed. Then he finally heard a name, a shocking name at that.  
  
"Seifer." he heard Quistis's voice say quietly. His throat tightened and his fist clenched, getting ready to jump in there to get rid of him.  
  
"Quistis?" A manly voice replied.  
  
"Seifer, I missed you." Squall's eyes shot open.  
  
"As did I you." Squall couldn't believe his ears, 'What is Seifer doing here, now? This cant be right!' He opened the door a little farther so he could peek in. There Quistis sat, on her bed, with his arms tightly around her and head resting on his shoulder. Seifer breathed her in deeply, then he caught a glimpse of movement at the door. He looked up quickly at the figure standing in the shadows and an evil smile of revenge swept over his previously tranquil face. Squall had noticed his stare and quickly made to leave, quickly but silently closing the door. Before it was all the way shut, he heard Seifer speak once more, "Quistis, I've got to kiss you."  
  
  
  
I hope this was enjoyed.although I don't think I have kept everyone in character very well.oh well. Only like two more chapters, I think.maybe three?.but I want only two more, hehe. Please r/r and let me know what should be changed and all that jazz! *beams* thanks! 


	3. Part Three

Did you want me to change?  
  
Well I'll change for good  
  
Squall ran down the hall and turned a corner, slumping down on the floor with his head on his hands. 'I gave my life for her, gave up my marriage, and discovered I loved her only to have her stolen by him.' He grew angry and bitter at himself and the world as he sat there, his eyes swirling into a storm of despair.  
  
Voices coming from another hall finally erupted into the corridor, which Squall sat, revealing whom it was; Selphie, Zell, Irvine and Rinoa. They all saw Squall and said hello to him, but he only stared at the tile on the floor in front of him. All of Rinoa's bags were packed to return to Deling City; her father's private train was on its way to pick her up.  
  
They walked by Squall, trying not to have the urge to stop and talk to him because they didn't want to make it awkward with Rinoa there and all. Rinoa stopped, however, and motioned to the others to continue without her.  
  
"So," she said solemnly, startling Squall, "I'm leaving to go home, not that you care or anything." her voice trailed off, not meaning to say anything resentful towards him. "Squall, I do love you even though I might have not acted as though I did. I have realized a lot of mistakes I made by pressuring you into something you didn't even want, and for that, I am sorry." She continued to walk down the hall after a moment of silence, she had hoped he would have said something in reply. However, Squall sat, still staring at the same tile on the ground.  
  
"Good bye, Rinoa." He sighed with a breathless whisper.  
  
"Oh!" Rinoa exclaimed, turning back towards Squall, "I almost forgot to give this back." She removed the chain from around her neck and took Griever, the silver lion ring, from its place on the silver thread-like necklace, tossing it into Squall's lap. It bounced off his leg and rolled upon the tile floor into his view. A moment later, the hall was empty again and silence reigned.  
  
Squall sat in the surrounding silence for a while longer, absorbing the treat of the company of his now only companion, Griever. He picked up the ring and placed it on his finger, somewhere it had not been in months. Then he slowly got up and decided to leave Garden, just to get away from the pain and to be ultimately alone. He would only bring his gunblade and Griever. He walked up to his office and made an instructional tape for the students to watch in the morning, so as they wouldn't be in a total loss without him.  
  
He packed a few essentials and walked towards the outer parking lot, where the Ragnarok was stationed, but took the long way around, which involved walking through side walkways which wrapped around the entire garden and lead to the various places as an outside route. The storm had come in, and it now poured rain, magnifying Squall's gloomy mood. He walked through the alley-like pathway, which was under the dorms' balconies. He looked up at his old balcony, where the light was still on and two silhouettes were casted upon the wall inside the room.  
  
And I want you to know  
  
That you'll always get your way  
  
The Ragnarok was gone, probably to take Rinoa to Balamb. He sighed loudly, "Why don't they ever ask me about borrowing my ship?" He didn't want to drive anywhere on the small island, so he sat on the back of a pickup truck, waiting for the trio to return.  
  
About 30 minutes later, the loud hum from the large dragon-like ship was heard, and a moment later it landed in the newly built landing bay, located next to the parking lot. Squall meandered over to the loading ramp of the ship as it opened with a screech as the metal scraped at the floor. He stood, waiting for his comrades' hair blowing from the wind created by the rocket-powered ship, and his hand on his hip.  
  
The three appeared at the top and slowly walked down, discussing what they thought had happened with the sudden change of feelings in Squall and Rinoa, and Squall coughed so they could notice he was there. Zell saw Squall and stopped mid-sentence.  
  
"Hey Squall!" He said enthusiastically walking down the platform. "What's up?"  
  
"I'm going away for a little while, taking the Ragnarok. I just need to get away." They all looked at him with shock. He hadn't taken a vacation in so long, even after defeating Ultimecia he went back to work as soon as humanly possible.  
  
"Are you alright?" Selphie asked with a worried expression.  
  
"Yeah, I mean, Squall Leonheart just doesn't take a vacation for no reason!" Irvine chimed in.  
  
"Look, I can't be here any longer, I just need a break." They nodded understandingly.  
  
"Where ya heading off ta?" Zell asked while leaning against a wall and making sure his hair was up straight.  
  
"I'm just going to travel a little, visit people maybe. I haven't seen Lugana and Sis in a long time, I might stop in Esthar for a little while. Maybe check up on Edea and Cid. Besides, I have to inform them of the changed events, can't have them showing up in two days for the non wedding."  
  
"Sounds great!" Selphie ecstatically replied as she clasped her hands together, "I haven't seen Matron in ages!"  
  
Zell glanced at Selphie to receive a quick wink and he nodded, "Yeah, and I bet Cid would love to see us all again!" Selphie nodded.  
  
"And Ellone." Irvine said, licking his lips, "Haven't seen her pretty face in almost a year now!" Selphie glared with jealousy and anger and smacked him on the arm. He just smiled at her teasingly.  
  
"Well, maybe I wont look forward to seeing her then," She giggled. Squall looked at them with disbelief.  
  
"You're not all coming, are you?" They nodded in unison.  
  
"Let's go get packed, cowboy." Selphie said to Irvine as she pulled him down the walkway toward the dorms.  
  
"C'mon Squall, it will be fun and get your mind off of stuff. Let's go get packed as well." Zell put his arm around Squall's shoulder and walked him towards the dorms. Squall didn't know what to do, it all happened so fast, so he gave up in trying to change it. "Hey, did you ever get to tell Quistis?"  
  
"No."  
  
And I wanted to say  
  
Don't you shiver?   
  
Quistis lay in Seifer's lap while he played with her hair, tying little braids with the golden strands. She watched his eyes and loved the way the black pupil stretched into the blue-gray of his iris, like a blot of ink seeping into paper. They were both happy and content just to be together, in this silence, at that moment.  
  
A knock at the door sent them spiraling into a frenzy of terror. Quistis's heart nearly jumped out her chest. "Hide!" she whispered to her comrade.  
  
"Where?" He said, and she pointed to the balcony window. He quickly abided and crawled out the small window, just as Selphie burst into the room. She looked at Quistis then at the rest of the room in confusion.  
  
"Don't you know how to answer a door?" Quistis, wide eyed, nodded and smiled. "Eh, it doesn't matter, I'm glad you're up!" She ran up to her and beamed a bright anxious smile. "We're all going on vacation! Let's go go go!" Quistis took a step back, flabbergasted at this new idea presented before her.  
  
"V-Vacation?" Selphie ignored her and was already rummaging through the closet in search of luggage. 'Good thing Seif didn't hide in there' she thought in relief. "Where and why are we going?"  
  
"Does it matter? It's going to be great! Just like old times!" She said as she pulled clothes out of a drawer, throwing them into the open suitcase on the bed. "Do you want me to pack everything for you, or are ya gonna help me out?" The blonde reluctantly gave in, knowing she didn't have an explanation or reason to stay home, unless she revealed Seifer. She scurried Selphie away from the drawers before she broke something and Selphie continued to pack what she thought was useful, finding an article of clothing, made of heavy material, on the end of the bed. "Do you want me to pack thi." Selphie recognized the Red Cross on the sleeve and looked at Quistis puzzled. "Do you want me to pack Seifer's jacket?"  
  
The one in red froze, clenching a sweater tightly in fear, not turning to see Selphie's perplexed face. But the auburn hared one's attention was directed somewhere else-to the figure squeezing through the window. "What the hell?" she wheezed, backing up slightly.  
  
"Hey, Selphie." Seifer said with a sheepish tone.  
  
"What's going on here?" Quistis moved over to her lover who naturally wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer. "Oh my gods!" the embracing two nodded solemnly.  
  
"Please, don't over-react like you usually do." Quistis said with concern.  
  
"M-Me? Over-react?" Selphie replied, dramatizing her hurt face that someone would imply such a thing, when, in reality, Selphie felt like screaming out for the others. "How long has this been going on?"  
  
"Today."  
  
"How?"  
  
"I don't really want to go into that with you right now, please." Quistis looked at Seifer and knew she couldn't leave him behind now. "So you see, I cant go on this vacation, not now."  
  
"Why doesn't he just come along?" Quistis and Seifer both gave a little nod no.  
  
"Oh, I don't want to be a bother-" He tried to change her mind.  
  
"Of course you wont!" Selphie interrupted, then she placed her hands on her hips and smiled cockily. "Ill be sure they have no problems."  
  
"Thanks Selph, but-"  
  
"No buts about it! You two are coming! Just get down to the Ragnarok ASAP!" they both nodded and smiled to her child-like nature. She then turned and ran out the door, dreading that impending doom was around the corner. As soon as the door clicked shut, Seifer picked up his jacket and put it on.  
  
"Where are you going?" Quistis inquired while grabbing his tense arm. "You can't leave me now, I need you."  
  
"Quisty, do you really think that's a good idea?" She just looked at him with teary, confused eyes. "I mean, they won't be as good at pretending like Selphie was." He really did want to stay, for her, but he knew Squall was going to hate the idea. She let go of him and sulked slowly back towards her bed. A firm hand gently took her arm and turned her to face dark blue eyes, "Look babe, you and I both know its not going to be an easy venture.but, ill go." Quistis jumped into his arms.  
  
"Thank you! I promise they will soon love you as I do!" Seifer pulled her away.  
  
"You love me?" She smiled slightly and nodded a slow yes. He kissed her passionately, his heart soaring.  
  
*******  
  
Pwah! So I finally got another chapter up *wipes brow* phew, took me long enough.I've been struggling to get this done while doing homework, getting my artwork done, dealing with a friend moving, and living with my own guy problems.however, I was blessed with the depressed mood in which I need to write with today, so here it is! Yay for me! *laughs* yeah, so ill try to get the next one up soon, please r/r because id like to know how my writing skills are, I need those flames as well, must up my skilz. Thanks! ~ViciousPixie~ 


	4. Part Four

Don't you shiver?  
  
Sing it loud and clear  
  
Squall and Zell waited in the Ragnarok conference room, sitting in the large, red plush seats.  
  
"Where is everyone? I'd like to get to Esthar by morning!"  
  
"Calm down, Squall." Said Selphie as she entered through the door, with Irvine close behind, loaded with luggage. He had a mad glare on his face which quickly dissipated as Selphie turned to look at him. "Put them over there." She said, pointing to a corner already occupied by the two men's bags. The brunette and blonde laughed as Zell made a whip cracking noise. "So we're going to Esthar first?" She asked, ignoring their childishness.  
  
"Yeah, for a few days anyway."  
  
"Um, do you think it would be alright to have one other person join us?" Quistis timidly asked from the doorway, making everyone turn to see her. Squall glared with disgust, and jealousy.  
  
"I don't know, who is this other person?" He said, with a sarcastic tone that make Quistis shiver in fear of her next sentence.  
  
"Well." She reached next to her, behind the wall, and pulled Seifer into view. Everyone's jaw dropped, except for Squall, who sat completely emotionless, with a silent rage fuming behind his stormy eyes. Quistis blushed with shame and fear from what they would say next.  
  
"Oh my god!" Yelled Selphie, over-exaggerating her "surprised' reaction.  
  
"You said it!" Irvine replied, stepping away from the figures in the doorway.  
  
"Is this a joke?" Zell said looking to Squall for an explanation or expression of hope, but found no such refuge.  
  
"You want him to come along?" Irvine asked in his slightly accented voice. Quistis only nodded.  
  
"You've gotta be kidding!" Zell exclaimed.  
  
"Chicken-wuss, calm down." Zell huffed at him and started to punch at the air. "I'm not here to harm any of you, and I'll go if I make you uncomfortable." Seifer said in monotone, looking at Squall when he spoke 'uncomfortable'.  
  
"No way will Squall allow-"  
  
"Zell, it's quite alright. He is as welcome as Quistis." His voice seemed full with resentment and anger as they came out, but he now smiled warmly (or a fake one, rather) and all were put off guard. Zell dropped his fists to his side from their ready position in shock.  
  
"You sure, Squall?" Seifer asked, voice quivering with submission. Squall got up and walked over to reach his hands out to the couple, who both cautiously took them. As hurt and angry Squall was, he looked into Quistis's eyes and saw the gleam of happiness he had so missed, the one that had gone missing for quite a while. Somehow Seifer was able to possess the power to make her happy, and that made Squall think maybe he was the better person for her.  
  
"I welcome you both to join us." The leader's obvious supremacy shined brightly as the others shyly gathered around the new members, all smiling with acceptance.  
  
I'll always be waiting for you  
  
I'll always be waiting for you  
  
Thirty minutes later, Selphie jumped into the pilot seat and started the Ragnarok off towards Esthar. The others were still in the conference room talking with the old enemy about random topics, enjoying his friendly attitude for a change. Zell's itching fists finally calmed as he began to see that Seifer was no threat at that moment, but he still couldn't get over the fact that Quistis was with him. Then he realized something.  
  
"Where'd Squall go?" He asked, while glancing around, hoping to hear the brunette's voice.  
  
"Didn't he go with Selphie?" Irvine stated, then the door opened and Selphie walked in.  
  
"Hey!" She said with a quick wave and a wink to Irvine, but then noticed they were all quiet. "What's going on?"  
  
"Wasn't Squall with you?"  
  
"Nope. Was he supposed to be?" Zell got up and walked towards the door, but was stopped when Seifer grabbed his arm.  
  
"He may want to be alone right now." Zell looked at the hand on his arm and to tore it off.  
  
"Don't touch me again." Then he stormed out, into the elevator room.  
  
Yeah, I'll always be waiting for you  
  
For you, I will always be waiting  
  
Zell glanced around the elevator room hoping to glimpse the illusive Squall, but with no prevail. He headed for the door to one of the storage rooms on the left when he heard a loud, screeching noise. He walked through the door ahead of him, which the sound seemed to emanate from. He went to the edge of the balcony that over looked one of the holding bays and saw shadows dancing across the metal grated floor. Just then, another ear-splitting crash went off, and Zell knew exactly what was happening. He walked farther down the long set of stairs and slowly emerged into view of the gunblade-slinging figure in the dark, cold metal room.  
  
"Squall, you alright?" He had never seen such expression on Squall's usual placid face. Squall dropped his arms to his sides, shoulders slumped and head down. Zell walked closer to him, but with caution, "Squall, what's wrong?" Zell put his hand gently upon his massive shoulder and was startled when Squall quickly turned to face him, tears brimming his blood- shot eyes.  
  
"Ruined.everything, I ruined it all." Squall said, breathlessly as he slumped down towards the floor. Zell tried to catch him, but Squall just crumbled into a depressive heap on the metal, unforgiving floor.  
  
"Squall, what are you talking about?" Zell squatted next to Squall with his arm around his shoulder.  
  
"Zell, everything in my life, gone, ruined, squandered by my careless recklessness. I don't know what's been going on in my mind.I always push away the good things in my life until its too late!" He slammed his fist on the floor.  
  
"Squall, you'll never get rid of me, nor Selphie, Quistis or Irvine."  
  
"I already lost Quistis. I waited too long to tell her how I felt and now look what happened!" His voice was filled with resent and remorse, while gesturing towards the conference room with a hand. A tear rolled down his cheek and he feverishly wiped it away. "I lost her to him." Another pound of a fist muffled the sound of a gasp, coming from the top of the stairs.  
  
And its you I see  
  
But you don't see me  
  
Quistis couldn't believe her ears. The one she had sought after for so long felt the same about her, dropped his wedding for her, and she just fell in love with another. She covered her mouth with her hands as she continued to stand in shock, eavesdropping.  
  
"Oh Squall, I'm so sorry." Zell said sympathetically.  
  
"I walked in to see them.on the bed.kiss." His words faded into mumbles as he stared at the opposite wall with a lost, blank face. Up above, Quistis was startled by the elevator room door as it opened a stressed-looking Selphie frantically stumbling out.  
  
"Where's Zell?" Quistis motioned below towards the still crouched on the metal floor pair. "ZELL!" She yelled out; Zell immediately stood.  
  
"What Selph?"  
  
"I need your help in the kitchen.I have burnt the hot dogs." She flinched as Zell gawked at her stupidity, Squall even turned to look up at her with a "how the hell can you do that?" expression, which quickly changed into a crimson blush when he noticed Quistis standing in the shadows.  
  
"You did WHAT?" Zell ran up the stairs, momentarily forgetting Squall while his mind panicked, thinking he may not get to have hot dogs. "Er.um." he stopped and looked back down at his friend, who only waved him away.  
  
"Its alright, thanks for listening to me." Zell smiled and ran off with Selphie to the kitchen. Squall ignored the presence of Quistis and picked up his gunblade. Walking over to a box, he sat upon it and took out a cloth and flint, proceeding to clean and sharpen the already radiant metal. Quistis rubbed her hands together nervously and cautiously walked down the stairs towards the dark shadowed corner in which Squall sat ominously. She stood over the hunched man and cleared her throat, hoping he say something first. He wouldn't even look at her. He only continued to vigorously hit the flint across the edge of the blade.  
  
"I heard what you had said." She whispered the steady hand holding the blade loosened its grip and slightly trembled with fear. "Squall," she said, placing her hand on his shaking knee, "I have feelings for you, too." He looked up, waiting to hear her sweet voice say more, but she only looked away, avoiding his icy stare. ".But." He then looked away, knowing he didn't want to hear the rest of this sentence, "but its out in the open too late, I'm with Seifer now, I cant leave him now for you, again."  
  
"Again? You mean," She nodded.  
  
"I've loved you since I broke up with him, the day I saw your beautiful face scarred by his hand." She traced the scar on his face with her index finger and smiled, sending shivers down Squall's spine, "So I guess this was all my fault in the end."  
  
And its you I hear so loud and so clear  
  
I sing it loud and clear  
  
"Do you l.love Seifer?"  
  
"I do. He's loved me so much for all this time, caring for me and watching over me. He fills a gap in me that has been empty, waiting for you."  
  
"Quistis, I had thought the same about Rinoa, until I awoke from the lie. I realized you are the one for me. I would go to the depths of hell for you, Quistis."  
  
"I wish I had known sooner." Squall stood and Quistis followed suite. She wouldn't allow him to just walk away this time. "Please, don't be difficult, can't we just talk?" it was then that she noticed his eyes were damp with the forming tears, one of which was trickling down his cheek are the one for me. I would go to the depths of hell for you, Quistis."  
  
"I wish I had known sooner." Squall stood and Quistis followed suite. She wouldn't allow him to just walk away this time. "Please, don't be difficult, can't we just talk?" It was then that she noticed his eyes were damp with the forming tears, one of which was trickling down his cheek. Seeing him in such pain antagonized her and she herself started to cry. She forced herself into his arms to hold and be held. "Squall, please don't get upset." She mumbled into his fur trim from his jacket.  
  
"Quistis." he turned so his lips were against her ear and his nose nestled into her hair. ".I love you," he whispered into the delicate earlobe. She lifted her face, full with tears, again, to see Squall, oddly enough, equally emotional. Uncontrollably, he kissed her, but she had entirely forgotten about her blonde beauty upstairs and returned the kiss. 


	5. Part Five

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" The two instantly jumped away from each other and looked up towards the maker of the bellowing demonic voice. There Seifer stood, jaw open and brow twisted in anger looking down on them with a scared Zell, who backed instinctively away from the muscle bulging man.   
"Seifer!" Quistis yelped, pushing and backing away from Squall, who did the same. Seifer, in one graceful, gallant leap, landed with a loud 'thud' on the metal floor, in-between the two, and in front of Squall's blade.  
"What was that I just witnessed? Tell me it wasn't what I thought!" He snarled at Squall, then turned with hopeful eyes to Quistis. He noticed the tears flowing down her face and he wanted to do what he had said he would; kiss them away.   
"Seifer, I am so sorry, it just happened. . ." She pleadingly looked at Seifer, face full with guilt, and cried even harder.   
"Just happened?!" He kicked a box across the room, "That also just happened!" He threw his arms in the air with exasperation growing in his heart. 'History repeats itself' he thought.   
"Seifer, please calm down." Quistis begged, reaching out to touch his arm. Seifer reacted before he thought and as soon as he felt the pressure on his jacket, he turned abruptly and slapped her across the face. Quistis fell to the ground, stunned with pain.   
"Quistis!" Squall exclaimed, rushing over to help her, but was intercepted by the furious Seifer who flung him across the room. Zell ran down the stairs, yelling at the brute to stop. Seifer crouched down to the crumpled Quistis and cradled her face.  
"Quisty, I'm so sorry babe. . . you know I didn't mean it. . . I love you too much to want to hurt you." He lifted her into a sitting position and saw that half of her face was red from the sudden surge of blood, which filled her fast swelling face. "I am so sorry." Seifer wrapped her face in his massive hand, but she pulled away. Seifer's eyes filled with anger again, and lifted his hand from her, as if he was going to retaliate against her disobedience.   
"Seifer, stop!" Zell yelled from the opposite corner, helplessly. Seifer looked up at the tattooed one, whose fists were curled defensively ready, and let out a laugh. Squall walked up closer to Seifer, trying to get him away from Quistis, whose face was filled with pain and fear. Seifer saw the movement in the corner of his eye and jumped up, whirling around to face the surprised brunette. In one quick motion, the sound of a sword being unsheathed echoed in the room and Seifer held in his possession a shinning blade of destruction, outstretched towards Squalls throat, ready for a fight.   
"What do you think you're doing, pussy?" Seifer snarled at the backing away Squall. Zell snuck over to help Quistis get away from the impending doom and brought her upstairs, calling for Selphie and Irvine in vain. Seifer continued to encircle Squall, threatening to thrust the meter long blade into the brunette's chest. "Quistis, she is mine, and you nor anyone else will ever have her!" Seifer charged, gunblade held high over his right shoulder. Squall stood like a deer in headlights until the last second, then he rolled away towards his glittering blade. He jumped up and and positioned the blade in from of him, awaiting the next charge.   
"I've tried my whole life to out do you, to prove I can be better then the "perfect lion", but I always end up back in your shadow!" He pivoted and held the blade like a bat, finger on the trigger. "No longer will I suffer being only second best!" He sprinted again, swung the blade, and pulled the trigger. Squall dodged the blade, but the fire from the shot singed the fur trimming of his coat. Squall struck the opposing blade with his own, the metal creaking and sparks flying from the intense force inflicted upon them. They pushed each other closer so the swords were in front of their faces in a deadlock. Seifer lifted his leg up between them and pushed Squall away, blades unintertwining with a spark. Seifer backed away, still staring his nemesis in the eyes, and with a snarl he growled and hissed his words at him.  
"Always, always stuck in the shadows of the lionhearted one. Always left behind to be ignored and forgotten. Always behind you." Seifer circled around Squall like a tiger stalks it's hurt prey before it pounces, Squall ready and showing no fear. Then, Seifer stopped moving and looked at the ground, deep in thought. "After she left me, left me for you, I didn't know what to do or how to react to anything anymore. Nothing seemed to matter to me, she was all I had, and she was the only one I thought that would be here for me until the end. But you, you took that away from me as well. I had thought to myself that I was the bad one; I was the one at fault for everything. Maybe I didn't treat her right, maybe I wasn't enough for her, maybe I'm not enough for anyone . . .I was lost and drowning in my own despair until I thought about the facts."  
Seifer looked back up at Squall and glared with a stare that you would think could pierce through stone and chill the hottest of flames. "Its all about you. You have been the ultimate cause of all my failures, all my neglect, you have always been the one to steal anything that has ever mattered to me. So, instead of killing myself and ending my mistake to live, I decided that day and ever since to rid the world of over achievers like you. Rid the world of people with perfect teeth and skin, people whom get admirers no matter where they went, and you were the first to go on my list. Of course it failed on my first attempt, but I have never given up, and I never will!"  
Squall looked at Seifer, puzzled, but never once let his guard down, waiting for the crazed blonde to attack at any moment. Seifer continued his hate glare and his speech, "I'm tired of being infamous, of being in your shadow. It ends, NOW!" A streak of gray fury darted across the room towards Squall as if in fast-forward, and a sword high above the gray streak's head. The sprinter ran to the brunette and slammed the sword down, aiming for the neck; but Squall was able to deter the blade with his own, holding it off. Seifer striked again with the same velocity and fury, only lower. Squall blocked the attack and as soon as the opposing blade was pulled back to get ready for another blow, he stabbed his forward. The blonde backed off, looking down at his torso area where a large gash went across his gray trench coat. He smiled and snarled, "You missed."   
With a shrug he shed the heavy torn trench coat to expose his muscular arms and blue vest. Squall took the advantage of this time to do the same with his own prized coat, but was immediately bombarded with more strikes of the blondes blade. They exchanged lunges and blocks for a while, both equally matched at using their weapons of choice.   
Quistis and Zell only watched in vain, unknowing what to do. Quistis couldn't take it any longer and jumped up, as Zell held her back, and yelled out "Stop it you two!"   
Squall had forgotten about her being there and glanced around to see her and Zell standing upstairs, with worried expressions on their faces. He realized how surreal this all was. 'How did I . . . how could I have let this happen?' Then, at that moment, his entire body went tense and the sound of a gunblade clattering on the floor echoed throughout the room, sending chills down the onlookers' spines. Squall's eyes grew huge with pain as he gasped for breath. He reached his hand to the source of the pain, where a foreign cold and hard object pierced through his body. He turned his head to see that of Seifer's, looking at him with utter shock and horror.   
"SQUALL!!!" Quistis yelled as she ran down the stairs and past Seifer. Seifer finally pulled the sword from Squall's stomach, who just became another statistic. He stared at the body he just removed it from as it slumped onto the ground, still gasping for air and gripping at the wound. The deep crimson liquid slowly seeped into the white shirt, covering the male's hands as he looked at them in surprise. Seifer stared at the body he had so longed to see this way for so long, but now regretted having to see it. He stared at the body, the body in the arms of his love.   
He stood there until a large force threw him to the ground and strattled his body. Fists pounded into his face, making the sickening 'pwack' noises as his nose fractured into little pieces. Zell threw punches into the blonde's face as the blood ran into his hair, making the yellowish strands a deep orange-red. Seifer only laid there, groaning every time he was hit again, but never fought back.   
Another punch and his teeth cut through his lip.   
Another and the blood filled his mouth and nose so as he struggled to breathe, it sprayed the hot red liquid.   
Another and he could feel his jaw and teeth collide, teeth breaking and tongue getting bit. Zell started to let up, the blows coming less and weaker.  
"K-kill me!" the beaten heap sputtered, blood flowing out his mouth. "Kill me! Get it over with!" Zell looked down at the disgusting pile of oozing blood and mangled flesh then stood up.  
"I wouldn't want to give you the satisfaction of taking the easy way out." Then he turned around and walked over to Squall and Quistis, face changing from anger to shear fear and worry. "I'll go get the others!"  
  
  
  
"Squall, hang in there, we're going to get you help, I promise." Quistis cried to the body in her arms. "You'll be ok, wont you Squall? You're strong, you'll live, don't you worry about it." She knew she was only trying to make herself feel better, and Squall knew it too. He stared into her eyes, trying to say something to her, but his thoughts were so preoccupied, he couldn't put his mind to it. He could feel his body slowing; his heart was pumping fast, but slowly descending in beats.   
Zell returned with the others, Selphie already in tears at the sight of him. "Squall! Oh my god, Squall!" She tried to cure him, but his body only seemed to react the opposite to it as it writhed in pain, almost convulsing.   
"Stop, Selphie!" Zell helped Quistis hold the writhing body down to stop it from going into a seizer, and it eventually stopped. Squall relaxed and returned to looking into Quitis's eyes, happy that she was there at this moment. All the pain he was feeling seemed to be lifting, his thoughts were clearing, he couldn't even hear the pounding of his heart in his head anymore.   
"Q-Quistis . . ." he tried to speak, voice filled with pain as he tried to gasp for air. "Quis-ty, I l-love yo-u . . ." Quistis smiled at him as best as she could.  
"I love you too, Squall." She bent down and kissed his lips as he let out a weak, but sincere smile which slowly faded as his eyes closed and his body relaxed even further. "Squall?" Quistis shook him, hoping he was still there, but there was no response, "SQUALL??" Everyone in the room knew the lionhearted, their leader and comrade, was no longer. She hugged him closer, laying down next to his body, the blood soaking into the pink of her fabric. The others were all crying, Irvine putting his arm around Selphie to comfort her. The only existing sound in the cold metal room was Quistis's loud sobbing.  
"Squall…" 


End file.
